Scala dei Turchi, which means the “Turkish staircase”, is on Sicily’s southern Realmonte coast in the Provincia di Agrigento. The Sicilians are a bit sketchy about foreign nationalities. The place used to see lots of pirate raids from North Africa, and since Arabs, Moroccans, Tunisians and other foreigners are basically the same thing, the Turks…
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Sicily’s Valley of the temples, Agrigento
There’s a modern town called Agrigento on Sicily’s southern coast, but alongside it, in a fertile valley, lies an ancient Greek city also called Agrigento. These cities give their name to the Sicilian Province of Agrigento. Agrigento was founded around 582–580 BC by Greek colonists from nearby Gela, who named it “Akragas”. In its heyday,…
Castellamare del Golfo
A day in Castellamare Del Golfo involves seeing the sea a lot. It’s quite romantic! It’s in the Trapani region, which is in the Mediterranean but looking out in the direction of the Atlantic. I think it gets extra wind for that reason – there’s something about this side of Sicily that feels more adventurous…
The Italian Festival of Sicilyshire
What happens to Italians when they live in England? I became deeply worried about my husband and son this summer, after they had been living in the Stoke-on-Trent area for six months. When one has married an Italian, one simply doesn’t expect to be putting up with this type of thing: When I intercepted…
Buying a House in Stoke-on-Trent: the Italian point of view
We are looking for a house here in England. My Sicilian Hubby is, shall we say, going up a learning curve. He is learning to speak English. Learning to speak English from estate agents is probably not something most people would advise. They speak in a code which even English people have to learn to…
Found in Translation
One of the various jobs I did in Sicily was technical translations. I specialised in translating and co-authoring medical textbooks and research papers, and legal documents. You may think this sounds dull but, trust me, they are far more entertaining than regular translations. By doing this job, I learnt that Italian doctors are world leaders…
Where is the Sicilian Housewife?
Hello darlings! Sorry about my very long silence. It has provoked rumours of pregnancy (I am too old, mentally not biologically), lottery winning (I wish!) and falling down a large pot hole in one of Sicily’s main motorways (I just invented that one actually). None of this is true, but… Drumroll…. I am at last…
Camping like Tarzan
You may have noticed I’ve fallen quiet lately. This was partly because I hoped you’d miss my witty tales of derring do around Sicily so much you would decide to buy my hilarious novel to fill the void. It was mainly because the electricity keeps getting cut off. The electricity has been cut off 42…
Daily Life in a Sicilian Fishing Village
The fishermen in my village usually go out in these boats. Each village along the coastline has its own particular colour scheme. Our village uses orange, white and blue, but there are some fishermen who originally came from another village along the coast where they use green instead of blue. I always…
A Rough Start for the Rough Guide to Sicily
So, what’s it like to earn your living by going on holiday? Jules Brown, author of The Rough Guide to Sicily, describes his very first hilarious trip to Sicily especially for my blog. He has written stacks of travel guides, but Sicily was his first and, he says, still his favourite – despite how…
How authentic an Italian are you?
Originally posted on Englishman in Italy:
I asked Mrs Sensible if I could pass for an Italian, not a chance she said, you don’t dress like an Italian, you don’t think like an Italian and even the Italian words you know, sound funny when you use them. To prove her wrong I have put together…
The Kind of Blogs that Make Money
Since I’m skint, and my part of Sicily has 49% unemployment, I’ve been researching how to make money from blogging. If this doesn’t work, my only option will be to work in one of Sicily’s 1,456,998 Chinese shops selling tiny polyester clothes which smell of mothballs. I’ve found out there are three types of blogs…
A Scandalous Story about the Mafia, Extortion and Cake
Sicily’s Anti-Extortion spokesman is Arrested while Extorting 100k Euros In one of the most delicious news items ever reported since I’ve been living in Sicily, it turns out that one of the main men in charge of combating extortion in Sicily has just been arrested… for extortion. It was “Aggravated extortion,” in fact, which means…
How do you stop anyone stealing your motorbike?
Keep it on the balcony!
How to Annoy a Sicilian
Despite their reputation for having a volcanic temperament, Sicilians are actually a phlegmatic bunch. I’m endlessly amazed by what they’ll put up with. But, if you must, here are the Seven Secret ways to irritate a Sicilian from here to next Sunday. On Monday, make fun of his white vest. I once tried this on Hubby,…
Chivalrous Knights and Cloaked Assassins: Italy’s Five Martial Arts
When you say “Martial Arts,” most people think of Karate chops, Judo throws and the other unarmed combat techniques of the Far East. Yet it’s actually Italy and Greece which have the oldest martial arts traditions in the world. All they need is someone as cool as Bruce Lee to make them world famous! Here’s my…
Celtic Hair
My sister spent a year in Italy getting her hair persistently cut into a mullet. She went to a different salon every time and begged them for a “Little crash helmet” (caschetto), which is what Italians call a bob cut all one length. But apparently every hairstylist in Milan had signed a secret pact to…
Mazel Tov! The Sicilian Housewife goes to Israel!
Not really. I went to a “meeting” in the local council building to “discuss” the “promotion” of “tourism” in our town last night. All these “”””””” “”” ” ” “”” have a purpose and I promise to explain. Being an astute housewife, I realised very quickly that I had been lured there under false pretences…
Single Woman in Italy? The Sicilian Housewife’s Guide to Italian Men
I spent years travelling alone among the men of Italy. I wish I had known all these insider tips, which I’ve now learnt from my own Italian Hubby! Boundaries Italian men will do things that overstep “boundaries” in your culture. Their boundaries are different. One thing they will do, relentlessly, is chat you up in…
The Best and Worst of Sicily
Originally posted on secret sicily:
Veronica is the brain and pen behind Sicilian Godmother, where she writes about her life in Sicily as an English expat. When I asked her to write a guest post about things she loves and hates about Sicily, I didn’t expect to open such a big can of worms! Her initial draft was way…
Merry Christmas from Sicilian Santa
Some people think this is really one of the elves, angling for a promotion…. MERRY CHRISTMAS!
Christmas with a Sicilian family – a survival kit
Originally posted on secret sicily:
This post is dedicated to all the Sicilian expats who, like me, are going back to their homeland for Christmas. If you’re not from Sicily but for some reasons you’re spending Jesus Day with a Sicilian family, read carefully and repeat after me: “I can do this!” Here are the…
A Nativity Play that Fills a Town
I think Sicily produces the only nativity play in the world which features live belly dancers. It happens in the town of Termini Imerese, on Sicily’s north coast, which produces a nativity play each year which fills the entire town. The historic town centre is closed off and becomes the stage for a dramatic production…
How Macho Fantastico Cured the Flu in One Day
Hubby offered to hang up the laundry a few days ago, since I’ve had a nasty virus. I don’t know how, but he turned all my Brazilian style knickers into thongs that would fit an elephant. Did he secure them firmly to the washing line then bungy jump down to the car parked below? Use…
Why I Hate Parquet Flooring
This post is in honour of Global Have-a-Moan Day (which I just made up). Audience participation is encouraged! Parquet flooring is the new impractical interior decor trend in Sicily. They like it because it is ridiculously expensive and regarded as exotic. Having parquet floors is a way to show off. I used to quite like…
Fancy walking into the richest bank vault in the world?
You actually can. In Sicily. It is called the “Medagliere” and it occupies the basement of the Archaeological Museum of Siracusa, on the island’s south-eastern tip. You get an adrenaline rush just walking through the door. It is solid metal about four feet thick, with iron bars that poke out in all directions and penetrate…
So you’re Sicilian. Are you in the Mafia?
“Mummy, why are the baddies English?” my son asked me last week. He was watching “Rio”, a cartoon film about parrots in which the bad parrot, from the Brazilian jungle, inexplicably talks with a very posh English accent. “Well, it’s just one silly cartoon,” I reassured him. Then he listed all the English baddies he…
A Narrow escape from the Fashion Police
In Italy, it is against the law to emerge in public with bad hair. Italians remain housebound on bad hair days. In the summer, having white skin is also considered a serious fashion gaffe. There is simply no excuse. Strangers repeatedly threaten to report phosphorescent Celtic people like me to the fashion police. Sometimes gangs…
Seven Top Tips: How to cook pasta like a real Sicilian Godmother
When I got married, I was given a 35 person dinner service which had belonged to my husband’s grandmother. Not just a 35 person dinner service, but a nine-course 35 person dinner service. “I’m sorry a couple of items have got broken over the years,” my mother-in-law, The Godmother, apologised. A couple of pieces missing? Did…
QUESTIONNAIRE: Could YOU make the grade as a Sicilian Housewife?
Housewives exist all over the world, but Sicilian Housewives are a unique breed. Are YOU are made of The Right Stuff? Answer a dozen questions to find out! 1. What is the first thing you do when you get up in the morning? A) Have a mug of tea. B) Have a cup of coffee….
Are the Sicilians Africans or Europeans?
The Arabs and Normans ruled Sicily in medieval times, and left a legacy I see all around me in Sicily today. I see Arabs in the girls with big dark eyes and thick black hair, or in the little boys on the beach with nut brown skin. I see Normans too, in the fishermen with…
How Three Hellish Holidays in Sicily led to the Invention of Democracy
As I am having an operation, I am offline for a while. However, I am delighted to have friends who have offered to entertain and educate you with some cracking guest posts. Today’s guest post is written by Thorwald Franke, an expert on Plato, the lost island of Atlantis and many things historical. He has…
The Dangerously Truthful Diary of a Sicilian Housewife 